Playing soccer professionally is a luxury. It is the best job I’ve ever had. Interestingly enough, it is the only job I’ve had. Do I sometimes take it for granted? I would be lying if I said no, but every now and then overwhelming humility comes over me and I am genuinely grateful to play professional soccer. I have orbited around the game my entire life. For every important life decision, moment, or downfall, soccer has been at the center.
One of the greatest gifts soccer has given me is the ability to see outside myself. It is an aid that opens my eyes and mind to the paradox of how big, yet small the world is. Futbol is a global sport that fills locker rooms with different cultures, journeys, and worldviews while providing ample opportunities to absorb an alchemic life approach. FCC is just a section of the story that makes up a full narrative. Moreover, each player possesses a detailed journey layered with happiness, defeat, and sacrifices we are likely blind to. I am here to peel back those layers.
This week’s Corben’s Corner dissects the relocation scenario, a winding road in which professional soccer players around the world chase their dream while making monumental sacrifices along the way. Some might seem trivial or mindlessly worth it if the compromise is playing soccer for a living, but finding a balance is never what it seems.
I’ve noticed new beginnings are always accompanied by nostalgia. As you look forward, you can’t help but to think back. Relocation, in my personal understanding, will change your life in ways that make you adapt, reminisce, and eventually evolve. Let’s dive into the details and discuss a few personal relocation obstacles and learn a bit more about my teammates, as well.
My first and most dramatic transition came after I was traded from the Chicago Fire to the Philadelphia Union in 2014. For many reasons, leaving Chicago was a very bittersweet moment for me. I fell in love with the city and everything it had to offer.
If you’ve learned anything about me, or know me at all, I value relationships. They have taken me from team to team, city to city, and essentially built me into the person I am today. However, the tricky thing about building those relationships in our business is the inevitability of change. The realization that tomorrow I, or they, could wake up and be on a plane elsewhere. Suddenly, our relationship is no longer the same. Whatever was built isn’t lost, but amended. I know every person in any job, however big or small, has some type of instability. However, the volatility in professional soccer is always apparent.
Obviously, the underlying difficulty of this scenario is saying goodbye to everyone involved with the club. Day in and day out companions who are gaining life experience through the same lens. A strong bond is formed inside a locker room, but you’ll likely see them at some point on the other side of the ball. For me, the other challenge is leaving and redefining the relationships you’ve created off the pitch.
People and places throughout Chicago burrowed their way into my heart. For example, my neighborhood breakfast place Nookies where I would eat before every game day, my 3rd-floor apartment that overlooked the northern part of the city, the 24-hour Starbucks on North Ave where I invested late night hours thanks to Depaul University, my Trek cruiser, the Taco Joint, and countless friendships. These places probably mean nothing to you, but when I think about Chicago I can’t help but to reminisce and relish in how life was then. The point is each of these places and every person that I connected with in Chicago became a crucial component of my maturation. So when I woke up and realized those things that shaped me were no longer within my current grasp it was alarmingly off-putting.
To be honest, I struggle with this challenge. Would I rather have been on the team for four years and created all those relationships just to eventually leave them, or would I rather have just been there for a year, had my fun getting just close enough, and then leave with a clean break? I don’t know. A question I haven’t yet been able to answer.
Anyway, that got a bit too palpable. Let’s examine the other side of that situation.
Embracing the way relocation can affect you is the best way to deal with the change. Good comes with the bad, if you will. Yes I still miss a plethora of things about Chicago, but leaving gave me the opportunity to accept a new challenge. If you look at the relocation in new light, all the negatives turn themselves into new challenges.
A new city meant a new team, a chance to prove myself on the pitch once again and the ability to step outside my comfort zone. Relocation is unnerving, but once the initial shock decreases I have found that new and important relationships are just around the corner. After three teams and so many immeasurable memories, I have found my way to FC Cincinnati with knowledge gained and change endured.
Those examples were all related to my story. At the time, my life was very self-centered. I had no girlfriend, no wife, no kids or dog, so in the grand scheme of things maneuvering my life from one city to the next was quite simple. However, things become a bit more complicated when an entire family is involved.
Paul Nicholson moved from Wilmington, North Carolina, where his previous team was located, to FC Cincinnati. I played with Nico in Wilmington, and made the move just like him, but under much different circumstances.
He had just finished his fifth season as a Hammerhead and agreed to terms with FC Cincinnati - a huge decision for his soccer career and equally huge for his family. His wife Megan, his son, William, and his two dogs would join him on the 650-mile journey to our southern Ohio city. In Paul’s family’s case, the relocation scenario comes with decisions. They recently bought a house that they decided would need to be sold. Would it sell in a convenient time? Would they have to pay overlapping house payments? William, Paul and Megan’s adorable son, would need daycare in Cincinnati. How would he respond to new care? Would it be available? Megan would need to find a job in Cincinnati. Would there be any openings in her profession?
If you’re wondering, the Nicholsons answered all those questions and have adapted impeccably, but not without hardship. They left a city in which they cemented roots, both parting from a community that loved them, for a new start in Cincinnati.
How about Austin Berry? Before coming home to Cincinnati and helping build this club’s stardom, he decided to take a chance half way around the world in South Korea. I think we can all imagine the obstacles coupled with a move to a brand-new country. The language barrier, the distance, and the differences in culture, just to name a few.
As you can see, every person’s relocation is different. Depending on their life stage it can be exciting, exhausting, and everything in between. If you take anything from this article, try and absorb the fact that life is unpredictable. The adaptation and reception of a new beginning is difficult no matter the circumstances, but worth it. Each player that steps out on Nippert Stadium has endured, persevered, and accepted the randomness of relocation.
